May 4th, The Land That Time Forgot (1974)
First up, we have a tale so old, even I wasn't born yet - and I'm ancient! "The Land That Time Forgot" is like a family reunion for dinosaurs, except there's no awkward small talk, just large teeth. A German U-boat takes a wrong turn at Albuquerque and ends up in a land where evolution's on shuffle. It's a hoot watching humans figure out which end of a dino is the biting end. Spoiler: It's both.
May 11th, House of Frankenstein (1944)
Next, we stitch together some fun with "House of Frankenstein." Boris Karloff throws a monster mash, and everyone's invited: Dracula, the Wolf Man, and Frankie's Monster. It's like the Avengers of horror, if the Avengers were less about saving the world and more about wrecking it. Karloff's mad scientist is so over the top, you'll die laughing. Or he'll make sure you do.
May 18th, Scream Blacula Scream (1973)
Then we sink our teeth into "Scream Blacula Scream." It's got voodoo, it's got Pam Grier, and it's got a vampire who's smoother than my varnished backside. Blacula's back, and he's got a bone to pick with the living. If you thought your family reunions were rough, wait till you see a vampire crash one.
May 25th, Destroy All Monsters (1968)
Finally, "Destroy All Monsters" is the monster rally we've all been waiting for. Godzilla and friends decide to redecorate Earth in a style I call 'post-apocalyptic chic.' It's a real estate agent's nightmare but a monster lover's dream come true. If you like your kaiju battles big and your cities bite-sized, this one's for you!
So, tune in to Svengoolie, if you dare, and join me, Dale, as I throw more shade than a parasol in a solar eclipse. Remember, it's all in good spirits - unless I possess you. Then it's in great spirits!
Yours hauntingly,
Dale the Doll
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